i have learned a lot about myself these past two years but more so in the last 6 months than anything .i have lost a lot of things in the last 5 years but the one thing i have is a good family bond with most of my family . most of all though i am going to work on working through my issues and re building any of the relationships that i have destroyed i am on a super positive note and i a determined to not let my past be what dictates my future well not necissarily i am going to let my past creat my future because i am going to let all of my mistakes be what are my stepping stones to build my future and what help me to evolve into the man i stive to be . when the day comes for me to leave this earth i want to leave behind something more ,something my family can remember me by and money ends eventually .so i want to be remembered for the deeds i do . the great achievements that i have made and the mistakes i have made will be used as examples to show people that they to can be somthing more than more than the places they have been or the mistakes that they heve made . i want all the people reading this that once you give up hope or you give your self no fighting chance you will not be able to evolve as a human and i refuse to let my learning curvs be what breaks me i have learned great lessons at great costs and the value of the lessons are priceless . yes i do wish that i could have learned lessons for no cost but then what wold the value of the lesson be ? i have hurt people and i wish that that cost could have been avoided and yes it could have . That is another lesson learned . there ane times in my life that i do want to forget there are times in my life i wish i could freeze in time and live in that moment for ever but none of that is possible . the harsh reality is reality is . and i i could live out the rest of my life in harmony i am going to. i was once told that i am never happy and nothing is ever good enough for me and that is probably true but does it have to be a negative or can i fine tune this fault into a positive and use it to evolve myself into a better man? well bye for now to be continued till next time.

Ian Strawn
DOC #883484