Most days waking up are just like the last, wake up make coffee, check jpay, hang out til’ count time, maybe catch a show or something……..same s*** different day you know, you see thats the easy part of it all. I’m programmed to endure this daily now, I do my time, I don’t let it do me. I’m pretty easy going for the most part, but I’m human too so depression, an loneliness settle in sometimes an is very hard to shake, especially when there’s no one to turn to outside of the walls I’m surrounded by. I call one person an sometimes I can’t talk to her about what I’m going through mentally cause I’m afraid she won’t understand, I feel like nobody can fully understand until their in my shoes an have done a few miles ya know? This blog was inspired by a situation i’d went through today, like I said I call one person, but they work, an I can’t call an talk to her, so when I need to talk, or I want to simply say hello to someone, I can’t! I call an call an call, an since I only call one person 99% of the time I really didn’t realize how little of people I actually have to call, after calling every single person on my list an not getting a call excepted from NONE! Has put me into a very lonely place mentally, I can’t express to all of you how shitty of a feeling that truly is, especially when they pick up but choose to not except! But ay people have told me my whole life, ”Out of sight, out of mind” An that is so so true, so shout out to the one’s who answer that phone for the ones locked down, instead of seeing a call from prison on caller ID an blocking, or hitting the F-U button on us. Once again thanks for reading these blogs, my last one was fast. I wrote it quick but again shout out to Suzie for doing this its great what your doing!
Sincerely,
Nicholas Tylor Davis
DOC #732-840
P.S You can reach me on Jpay, put in my info an I will respond.
Categories: LONELINESS, Nicholas Davis