My journey started long ago… So many things have changed in that time… Many people have past away, those that were children are now grown… Some with kids of their own….. Loved ones have aged, I have aged…… Technology has done sooooo much in the last 18 years its unreal….. So much change!!!!!!!
I can honestly say, so have I……. In many ways!!!! So many things I thought mattered when I was young, doesn’t anymore…. An my views on what is truly important have changed drastically….. This comes with age and wisdom, tho….. I used to feel as if my life was over and nothing really mattered…. Figured I’d die here….. Can’t say that’s true anymore…. I have faith that I will get a second chance at life…. I’ve learned from my wrongdoings…. I’m sorry for the pain I’ve caused so many….. I’m a changed man!!!!! My faith in the universe, in life, in God has grown tremendously these last 6 or 7 years…. An I’ve never been a religious man, by any means…. Being raised Catholic, I’ve always had a sense of higher power, but nothing to the point of taking a bended knee and praying!!!! Something I’ve done quite “RELIGIOUSLY” these last couple years…. And it has been good for my soul….. If that makes sense???? I’ve begged for forgiveness for all my transgressions and I believe the Lord has forgiven me…..
Only if that was enough…. To be forgiven by God…. Only if that was enough to bring me home…. But no, I have to be forgiven by a board of people, who don’t know me, or how I’ve changed…. Never met me before…. Just reading up on my crime and other aspects of my prison file…. Which wasn’t the best early on in my sentence… As you could probably imagine, a 17 child being tossed into a cage with wolves…. To learn how to adapt “NOW”, or be devoured by the surroundings!!!!! Such a surreal experience, I must say….. I’ll spare you any graphic details, but a young boy, with not a lick of facial hair or any hardened features are prey to those who have ill intentions…. I was lucky to have dodged all attempts and fight off all forms of that kind of disrespect… Again, it wasn’t easy…. Its just not natural, for a boy to have to experience that…. Its scares you, it really does….. I thought that this is how my life was now….. Took me years to finally say to myself, this ain’t right, I’m better then this prison shit…. I refuse to have to except what the state of Ohio has given me…. I deserve another chance…. A chance to prove I’m not a animal, but a man…. A man who was a bit of a troubled kid, who hung around a bunch of other troubled kids…. Wasn’t just out there shooting, robbing, and hurting people…. Just was in the wrong place, at a terrible time…. And I wish I could change the way the whole thing transpired, I really do…. I will be haunted by my actions or lack there of, for the rest of my life…. But giving me a second chance at life could be a good thing, not only for me…. My nieces and nephews…. My future step children…. My grown son… Even my brothers and sisters…. I am living proof how things can get outta hand…. How just hanging out with a bad crowd could be such a harmful thing in your life…. Teach them to be humble, kind, and smart about the things they do…. Sooooo much good I could do!!!! More then just sitting here getting old…. As I’ve said before in previous blogs… I understand why I was put in prison…. I was on a path, in need of correcting…. But I’m not a broken man….. I’ve changed!!!!!
My journey is still a long road ahead…. But I’m on the right path, “FINALLY”, and I can see where I’m headed… Not lost at all…… And even when the lord blesses me to be released…. My journey would not be over… Cause I vow to fight for other children, put in prison for X amount of years, without any 2nd chance in their future…. That is wrong!!!!! We all deserve another chance…. Especially children!!!!!! ESPECIALLY CHILDREN!!!!!!
MY FIGHT CONTINUES……
THANX FOR LISTENING …….
AND TO ALL MY LOVED ONES, ESPECIALLY MOM, MARGARET, AND MY DAY 1 “JEANNA”!!!!!! YOU GUYS ARE MY ROCK….. COULDN’T DO THIS WITHOUT YOU!!!!!! MUAH!!!!!
Categories: Peter Kenney