INMATE LOVE/RELATIONSHIPS

Love By: Rodney Fenner

Distilled Love. I deliberately didn’t speak on Love when I did the romantic installment of Incarcerated relationships, but we all know Love plays an extremely crucial part. Love deserves it’s own space and not a cameo in another article. Everyone has run ins with the infamous Love, therefore we all have our own interpretations of it. As I’ve grown over the years and being incarcerated with an analytical mind and a propensity to ponder just about everything, Love naturally has owned a home in my mind for a while. Love teaches you something or multiple things in every relationship you have with it. I could write an array of articles on the divisions of Love; romantic, Love for family, friends, the love for our children, universal Love, Love of pets, Love of religion, etc. In spite of being deprived of this kind for so long, I have the proclivity to talk about romantic Love because we all have this congenital, inherent obsession to complete the equation of you plus me, plus Love equals forever one. This Love is so sought after. Yearned for. Desired. It’s sold on chat lines the internet, in hotel rooms and wherever else monetary value can be gleaned from it, but we all know real Love can’t be bought. Real Love is beautiful, indelible and unique in every instance. It’s pure and unselfish. It demands absolute honesty and indemnity from all detriment. It commands attention and conquers the heart anew within every beat. It’s incapable of conjuring deliberate intent to cause hurt or negativity to its recipient. The sheer passion of this emotion pushes you to action, making it simultaneously a noun and verb. In the dictionary it’s described as the object of attachment, devotion or admiration; unselfish, loyal and benevolent concern for the good of another; to like or desire actively. I sometimes hear people say Love isn’t enough. I wholly disagree. It’s always more than enough. They say that as a euphemism to avoid acknowledging and saying that their love has diminished and downgraded or disappeared altogether. Love is an action word, remember? It moves us to fill in the gaps where other things in life fall short. If money is short for bills, pure Love will make you find a way to get it, if for nothing else but the sake of your beloved. If quality time with your beloved is usurped by life, Love forces you to make time. If circumstances draw melancholy on your beloved’s face, Love gives you the pencil to erase it and create amazingly picturesque jubilance. As long as it’s for the sake of your beloved’s well being or for your privilege to stay in close proximity to them and be the recipient of their equivocal affection, Love will power you because it is infinitely powerful. If one party thinks of or is actively being persuaded to stray, pure Love reminds them of why they got together in the first place and it will ardently renew the passionate desire to be together. Because I’m forcibly separated from my beloved, our pure Love has become the very effective cogency that keeps us despite the absence of physicality. Like a person’s body, when one sense is taken from it, Love sharpens in all other areas. It amplifies the mental, emotional and energetic awareness of the other. It doesn’t just amplify our awareness in those areas, it continuously strengthens, solidifies and protects our connection against the variety of injurious obstructions life perpetually feeds our situation. Trust me when I say that incarceration isn’t a factor when it comes to how unlimited those obstructions are. Those obstructions are the reason I’ve been saying pure Love instead of just Love. Obstructions can create impurities that are harmful to Love. Impurities like lust, lies, secrecy, greed, selfishness, lack of interest, being unsympathetic, being disingenuous and many others. The temptation for these things is latent all around us and there’s always a choice. When people find the gravity of the impurity irresistible, they allow it to saturate Love and damage it. Corrode it and taint it. Sometimes, it is completely destroyed. That’s why the choice is so important. It all comes down to what means more to you; the Love or the temptation. The truth is that this is one of those situations where only the strong survive. However, this strength applies to the Love and the strength of the Love depends on your cathexis with it. The more you sincerely invest in it, the easier it will be to resist the temptations and hurdle the obstacles. If you are dedicated to Love, your mission should be to strengthen it to the degree that it becomes effortless to laugh at temptation and cleave obstacles in half if need be. Pure Love will keep you safe if you keep it safe. It will enhance the quality of your life just knowing it’s there. This is also true of pure Love. Regardless of the number of people who’ve experienced it, the thought that they know what it is is a fallacy. The facetious irony is that though I’ve said all these factual things of pure Love, it remains inexplicable.

Rodney Fenner
DOC #1436377

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