THE LOVE I HAVEN’T HAD:

I tried not to stare
sitting there in the visiting room,
just two tables over.
They held hands
and observed passersby,
both smiling in time.
He’s done 37 years now,
she is still
at his side.
They needn’t speak much
to say to each other,
I’m still here.
He tried to run her off,
hoping she’d find
another to love.
Though to her
a whispered kiss
in quiet shared,
burned hotter
than flesh on flesh.
He smiled as he told me
she’s as stubborn as I,
I smile as I see them
sharing the love
I haven’t had.

I wrote this for a friend who never walked home, though he walked on…
That strong beautiful lady, I still talk to her on occasion. She is still as perfectly, stubbornly in love with him.

My parents are about to have their 39th wedding anniversary. I am proud them. They are my heroes in so many ways. They have stood shoulder to shoulder and walked a path not always easy.

Many of the stones they’ve stumbled on I threw upon their path. I haven’t the words to articulate my heartache, my “sorry.”

I get up each day grateful for the breath of one more day, one more chance. May today lead me closer home. May today allow me to clear the hurtful hinderances that clutter the paths of those beloved. May I someday, even if not today, be found worthy of that love.

The love I haven’t had…

Jeremiah Gilbert
DOC #709551