Assalaamu Alaikum!!
First and foremost thoughts and prayers to the families and everyone impacted by the events on #9/11…..
So.. no disprespect to anyone.. ANYONE!!! just to get some things off my mind and chest I’m letting all who read know how I’m feeling today. I’ve made many mistakes in my life obviously but… being in prison is a reality check like no other. Its no cake walk being a prisoner in any prison anywhere. Yes some prisons are worse than others but its a mental fight more than anything. You come into this world born innocent and everything you take in after that make you who you are. There’s a saying you have to take the good with the bad and that’s the perfect cliche for being in a place like this. Unfortunately as a prisoner my corner is empty.. romantically. Its even empty socially.. idk why.. InshaAllah things begin to change soon hopefully. Its difficult doing this time alone so to speak. Being able to pick up the phone and talk to someone who’s by your side 100% or loves you no matter what or just makes you smile and speechless is something I’ve been longing for. Despite not having a woman in my corner or someone outside my Aunt or mom or granny to talk to I’m pushing forward very optimistic about my future. My relationship with my kids is stronger than ever even though I barely talk to them. They’ve reached the age to where they know more than the average kid, they’re pretty smart kids and our bond will never break. Alright.. cool but now its like… yo… you need a woman. Not a girl, not a chick, A WOMAN. Strong, beautiful, natural, smart, sexy, driven, organized, independent, professional, a lady, very high sex drive for obvious reason!! She has to be silly, fun, beautiful smile, mandatory pedicures because I think I have a foot fetish on the low… (don’t tell nobody else lol). I said before I love and IMA sucker for long hair, beautiful skin, pretty nails, amazing smile, and beautiful eyes!! It may seem cosmetic but that’s what I’m into.. I’m attracted initially to what I described and I’m a pretty good judge of character after an interaction. I look for what level of intellect a person is on. What matters to that person, or what do you believe in.. what motivates you.. what are your interest.. are you open-minded or set in your ways?? I even think about how sex would be. I mean why not?? Do you scream, scratch and bite, moan, ride, squirt, and swallow. What faces do you make when I do this or that or how do you taste or what do your hair smell like?? Handcuffs and sexy lingerie, candles and roses… let me stop… or McDonald’s fries or Rally’s fries?? Like these things matter lol.. j/k!! I’m saying this to say this.. today I had my temperature checked (figuratively speaking) and if only things where different.. but they not but its kinda weird because its like you order your favorite cheesecake and it finally arrives and you bite into it and its better than what you expected.. or step on the gas peddle in a 2020 Corvette and your doing 60 in 3 seconds.. …idk.. SMH!! I don’t want to say the wrong things but I’m fstow right now. THAT.. today.. made me feel and know a lot.. #Beauty.. well …beauty is beautiful, and smart, stern, strong, amazing, rare, appreciated, wanted, needed, sweet, natural, sassy, motivating, influential, intelligent, sexi, admirable, edible lol .. smh.. This almost over though and sooner than later things will be much more different. I can’t wait to wake up holding my woman in my arms with her body intertwined with mine with that morning rush of blood running through our bodies and our hearts beating and my hand running through her long beautiful hair and staring in her beautiful eyes just before morning sex and our day starts.. Allah knows best!! When I see beauty I want to hold beauty and not let go. One day soon though.. It just sucks being surrounded by so many people and still feeling alone. Knowing your not alone is half the battle because now these walls and gates prevent a lot. Liberty, freedom, rights.. love, hugs, kisses.. you become closed in and its hard stepping outside your shell.. but its all about respect and integrity.. #Beauty has me thinking.. sunsets.. starry nights.. thunderstorms.. snow days.. time.. new memories.. new moments..new feelings.. new dreams.. faith, hope, love.. .. ….. alright people goodnight or good morning or good afternoon which ever one fits the moment!!! Be safe keep healthy and stay beautiful as always..
PS… I don’t want step out of line or seem disrespectful with anything I said but things aren’t different right now.. its no mystery #Beauty has heard everything I’ve said and more but its just what I can’t say at the moment. So… thank you #Beauty
Part II (On The Run) – Jay Z & Beyonce
Mr. Da’Von Motley Sr. #707-119
Abdul-HaLeem RaQeeb
Allen Correctional Institution
P.O. Box 4501
Lima, OH 45802
JPay/Mail
