Any Relationship built on “Memory Lane” cannot last. That’s an unstable & unreliable foundation unable to withstand the storms, earthquakes, & turmoil every Relationship eventually faces. Memories don’t tend to give an accurate depiction of events because each individual’s memory is colored by perspective, feeling, & time.
So @ their best, memories provide a building block of hope for a fantasy which never truly existed or can never be re-attained. At it’s worst, Memory Lane is a cornerstone of deception, manipulating people to hold on to something which doesn’t even exist. Either way, it’s a delusional foundation built on an illusion!
Whether memories conjure good feelings or negative feelings, they’re still snares which can keep one trapped in the past IF that’s all which exists between the individuals. Reality remains unseen & the Present Moment becomes a blind spot. This is no way to construct a Future consisting of an enduring Bond. The Present Reality must be embraced in order to propel progress forward. You have to see the other person for who he/she is NOW, not who he/she was, who you thought they were, & definitely not for what you want/hope they’ll be.
Learn who he/she is now in this day & time, & build something Real based on who you both are, rather than the memory of what used to be. If neither one of you are capable of letting go of the past, then there’s absolutely no hope of a Future. This isn’t to say that you have to forget the past or pretend it doesn’t exist. On the contrary, memories are good when they play their proper role. We should remember the good & the bad in order to learn from it. Reminiscing over good times can warm the Soul & even heal some wounds.
The point is that memories can’t be EVERYTHING. They can’t be the sum total of a Relationship or else it’s not a Relationship, it’s just a shared delusion. Love, Trust, & Loyalty come from knowing someone, accepting the vices & the virtues, motivating each other to unfold full potential, constantly improving oneself in a Commitment to be your best because you deserve to be & he/she deserves to have you @ your best, aligning your Spiritual & Moral Principles in tune with GOD’s Will without compromise!! Those are the Building Blocks of a Strong Foundation built to last.

SEAN BROWN
DOC #1083630