The new year is finally here. 2018 was such an emotional rollercoaster for me in so many ways for me. And as much as I believed that I would be unable 2 survive, in 2019 I realized I was and that I am actually stronger.
1.) The long time Love of my life, Boo, I painfully realized was no longer the woman I once wanted 2 spend my forever with. I realized after 26 yrs of her being in and out of my life during this long time of incarceration that she is unable 2 love me beyond a physical aspect.
That regardless to how close I am 2 coming home she still needed 2 feel the physical affections of another man. That the only support she knew or was at least willing 2 provide was conversation, no cards, no motivation, no pix, just nonstimulating hood talk that no man at 44 and no woman at 41 should still be engaging in.
2.) That the new love I had acquired was basically no different than the 1st in the end. I learned that a person can only pretend for only so long before the real them is eventually exposed.
In the beginning my new love said and done all the things I either desired or complained about Boo being unwilling to do. She sent pix, she came to visit, she JPayed and even wrote by hand…but then the real her surfaced.
Which means,Tanisha, would make all these promises of coming to visit, sending pix, putting money on the phone. And then break those same promises with elaborate reasons on why she was unable to answer the phone, why she didn’t send pix and having to work on her off days, losting her keys and other situations that would prohibit the promises made to be fulfilled.
In her defense, I will admit that she has been so emotionally and pyschologically scarred from previous hurts brought on by men that she wouldn’t allow herself 2 love or be loved in a healthy manner she deserved 2 be loved in. Instead of her chasing men who clearly don’t value her in the sense she should be valued in just becuz they are free and accessible. Basically chasing Mr. Right Now instead of being patient and fully embracing her very own Mr.Right (me)
3.) My only upside to 2018 was that I finally found God and encountered a love that I know now will never leave, I have encountered a relationship that I will never be taken for granted or forsaken regardless to whether or not I’m in prison or if I am a physically free man.
2019 also oftens me the relieve of knowing my physical freedom is now here. I see the parole board in Feb. so I know my chances for release are excellent !
I will then be able 2 find a woman who will be willing 2 love me with the same vigor and energy that I love her in. That will want to share her body with no other man other than me, understand the true meaning of loyalty meaning everything and respecting the monogamy that comes from a committed relationship.
Oh and says what she means and stand by it and have a loving relationship with God.
2019 has arrived and and I am ready ! As I remain simply
Maurice Robinson #274715
P.O. Box 8107
Mansfield, Oh 44901
or JPay me @ JPay.com/Maurice Robinson #274715 tell me what u think