I am sitting n this prison wondering about the future and my place within it. It is very difficult to cultivate relationships with people out there from here. It takes conscious effort for families and friends. It is a feat to stay relevant out there when you cannot vote or contribute to your people in a physical way. I have been away from my children longer than I was with them so it has been very trying to parent them. I have always written but it’s hard to determine If that has been enough. They have had to rely on God and one another to make it. I have always found out about things in their lives long after my advice could make a decision but I gave it anyway. They are very accomplished children. Having a mother in prison they still respect me and I know that God is to thank for that. For them to have heard nothing but negative things of me from various people and still feel positive feelings of me without the rightful and understandable negative feelings drowning those good ones out means all tbose times when I begged God to hold them and let them know in their hearts that I loved them it was happening. That alone has kept me breathing and trying to grow and learn in here. This coming year I hope to be on my way towards being an ordained minister. I push forward to the purpose God has for me. I serve God as myself without pretending to be someone else. I know that all I have survive has given me he ability to touch the lives that most others cannot touch. I have done things that people feel you cannot come from under as if you will always be that person. Not so because when God makes you a new creature you cannot ever be the same. I am evidence of this truth and the bible confirms this as well. Walk in your newness for 2019 and only reflect back to show unbelievers how far He brought you from. Feel free to contact me and ask any questions. I am an open book. Be encouraged out there.