I lay in this bunk at night with the sounds of the fan, snoring, and the ocassional dragging of the feet as the guard passes making his rounds. My thoughts are the clearest in these moments as they are allowed to run free. Everyone is asleep and the prison is quiet. There’s one thought that regardless of how many years may pass, it remains with me, having the opportunity to tell the mother of the young man taken from her, as contraversial as it may sound, that I’m sorry! To give her the opportunity to yell at me, strike me, curse at me, or whatever she feels is appropriate, is a thought I wrestle with night after night. I’ve matured a great deal over these twenty plus years of incarceration, and I didn’t always feel this way. Initially I was angry because I was aware that the friends of her son, the same ones that testified during my trial, knew that I didn’t shoot her son. That was a hard obsticle to overcome because I was given natural life in prison for a crime I didn’t perpetrate, and every motion that’s filed in court in an attempt at relief of this unjust charge and sentence, reminds me of the injustice and how it was so easy for the Detroit homicide detectives, firearms examiner, and prosecutor to concoct a lie under a oath they are suppose to respect, with no conscious.
When I began to make improvements on myself and face the things that were wrong about me inside and out, which was absolutely no easy task, I learned how to appreciate another persons grief while still fighting for myself. I began to take classes and read books that further explained what it meant to show compassion and empathy. It was no longer acceptable to hold the victims family accountable for the crime committed by Detroit’s police and prosecutor, I recognized the family as being railroaded by the system just as I was. The only difference is that I knew of my injustice, and that poor family thinks they have achieved justice for their loved one. Another crime committed by the same police and prosecutor, they allowed that family to come to court day after day thinking they were having their right to justice fulfilled, when in actuality they were being made accomplices to a public lynching. So unfortunate and tragic.
To think a thing is to give it life. Even if your thought may never reach its intended destination, there’s a chance it can still benefit someone. Understanding the above, I would like to sincerely offer my apologies and deepest sympathy to not just the mother of the young man taken over twentyone years ago, but to everyone who knew and loved him, and to anyone who has lost a loved one to violence. I’m sorry that you had to endure that unimaginable hurt and pain nobody wants to experience. Give me the negative energy that you build up after suffering a loss such as this. Let me relieve you of anything that can make you become bitter and angry as a tragedy can. Give it to me! When I meditate before I go to sleep tonight, I will release all the negative energy and all of us can start with a new focus and chose love instead of hate. We never know how deep injustice really goes, but we can forgive and rescue our souls from the lifetime of hate and stress. I continue to fight for my liberty while having empathy for the victims and their families, mine included because they have lived through this injustice with me. I would like to apologize to them also, I have caused them to live in prison every time they visit me or accept a phone call from me, pay for a private investigator to assist in my liberation, I’m sorry that you had to endure this, please forgive me.
If I could, I would take all the pain from the world and have it for myself, I prefer to see people smile with loud laughter. Thanks for listening, Mario
Reach me at:
Mario Collier #238834 @jpay.com, or snail mail me @
Mario Collier #238834
LCF
141First Street
Cold water, MI 49036
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