Have you ever felt like there’s nothing inside of your body? You can breath just enough to stay alive. It feels as if your lungs have been replaced by little water balloons. As for everything else it feels like everything is gone. Its so hard fighting temptation to fall back into my old way of thinking and living in here. It was so much easier to ease my pain and alleviate my worries by smoking and drinking. In here its easy to get caught up in these things. I’m proud to say that I haven’t but lately I’ve been fighting these thoughts. I reason with myself and say no one will know because no one cares. I’ll say since I have no one to talk to or no one comes to visit I’ll just do something outrageous. I’m close to Toledo and I haven’t seen my kids or anyone in almost 2 years. Its taking a toll on my mind and my emotions are at its peak. I have to workout just to keep my mind off life. I may read books and plan for my release date but hoping that anything will get better while I’m in here is just unrealistic at this point.

Da’Von Joshua Motley Sr.
ODRC #707-119
Allen Correctional Institution
P.O. Box 4501
Lima, OH 45802