First and foremost, I wanna thank everyone for their kind comments…. It truly felt like I had a voice…. Thank you…
My first blog brought many of my loved ones to tears….. Its nice to speak my mind on this blog… I feel like I can vent here, more then I could on the phone or visit, ya know????? We as prisoners dont realize the ripple effect of our actions…. The lives touched, even people we’ve never met…. Took me many of years to understand that…..
You know the question I’m asked the most???? “ARE YOU OKAY”???? And the biggest lie I’ve ever told was, “YES”!!!!! As a man, you never want your loved ones to know the hardships of this prison shit…. SOUL CRUSHING!!!!! An sooooo much time In solitary confinement, (just over 8 yrs worth), has probably done damage that I myself can’t see, and loved ones are too kind to speak on…… Solitary confinement is the cruelest form of punishment the United States has to offer….. I’ve witnessed so much damage to young kids in here, with the use of it….. Watch a pbs special, FRONTLINE–“SOLITARY NATION” you would have to watch the documentary to truly see what I’m talking about…. Breaking us down to dehumanize us in such a manner, that makes us act in the most animalistic form…. The mental breakdown is real, and takes time to recoup from… I’ve always told my mother, “I’m alright, I got this”…… Sorry ma, for lying to you!!!! Truth is the weight of all this is getting soooo heavy…. I’ve always told people the only fake thing about me, was my smile…. Cause deep down, I’m still that little boy, scared of what’s to come for me…… I’ve been incarcerated longer now, then I was alive before my incarceration…. LIFE???? Why is there not a number for it???? 25-30 yrs…. Is that not sufficient???? How long should a child take to “rehabilitate”????? Where is the rehabilitation???? Its the “Ohio Department of Rehabilitation and Corrections”!!!!! I see the correcting everyday…. None of the Rehabilitating….. It must just sound good to our liberal society….. I watch the news, and a lot of political shows…. An so many people want equal protection for people all over the world…. And I’m all for it!!!!! I don’t want anyone to suffer or struggle, but don’t turn a blind eye to the cruelty, and unfair practices of our own….. My equal protection only matters if I can afford to pay for it…. Why are we not talking more about reforming prisons…. We have more people incarcerated then any other country…. HOME OF THE FREE???? More like modern day slavery…. The states privative these prisons…. PEOPLE ARE BUYING PRISONS!!!!!! THERES SOOOO MUCH MONEY IN IT!!!!!!!! We get over charged for everything….. An for my loved ones to have the pleasure to send me money, to a private company, their charged a fee….. A fee….. A fee for the pleasure to spend the money with another company…. These people are crooks…. Whos getting the kick backs for all this???? For the work I do in here, I get 17 dollars a month….. I work every day!!!!!! I have to buy all of my own supply’s….. Everything but a couple rolls of toilet paper….. Sure there three meals a day if you can stomach it, but the cheap labor will pay for all that….. An all the classes, or most good programs, are hard to get into unless your going home or close to it…… This placed is designed to keep you…. Or to come back!!!!! Why would they want us to be successful when we get our freedom back????? They don’t really give us the tools to get back…. Buy the time we do, we are sooo far behind with the free world, we can’t catch up!!!!! The system is rigged…… Truly sad, and demoralizing…. People are profiting a lot of money when people come back…. Recidivism rates are high…. But for the heavier of charges like murder or manslaughter, the recidivism rates are much lower….. Why is that??? I have a theory…. Taking another humans life is a very scaring ordeal…. That effects you deep to your core…. Sort of a PTSD kinda thing, if you could imagine…. But only a true sociopath can commit such a offense and have no remorse or feeling of empathy…. So your average person never wants to cause that kind of harm to anyone again…… That’s my theory anyhow…. We are not sick or broken…. I saw the other day, a 13 year old boy, killed his 11 year old brother… Its hard for me to believe he is broken, and needs to be locked away for the rest of his life.. Their talking about giving him a “BLENDED SENTENCE”, which means he’ll go to a juvenile facility till 21, then be transferred to the adult system.. A practice I was not privy too….. Why is he not sent to a place where he can be treated by a phycologist?????? As soon as he gets to his facility, juvenile or adult, their gonna try to medicate Heavily, testing different medications…. SAD!!!!!
Its too bad no one famous can come to his aid….. Kim Kardashian, we need help too!!!!!! Come to our aid….. Shouldn’t take someone famous to bring light to this…
I do know there’s 2 sides to every coin….. And I’m sure the family of “T” , feel like I deserve all I have coming… And I respect that completely…. For all the pain I’ve brought you…. I’M SORRY!!!!!! But I was on a ugly path…. There is no excuse, just know I’m not that child anymore…. Please forgive me…..
Thank you all for listening!!!!!!!
Categories: Peter Kenney