its funny in prison you never be a human have emotions you have to pretend like your something els i dont know why this is because its truely srewing us all up in here. because i had to shut my emotion side down i struggle inter acting with some people when i call home. exsample ( my sister was crying becauseher dog died ) very sad but for the life of me i couldnt understand why she was crying i feel likeover the years ive grown numb to certain feelings witch is kinda scary in 1 week i will have a year left untill i leave this place and walk into freedom yet im not sure how well ill be able to deal with everyday life they say you come to prison to reabillitate ( probally spelled wrong sorry) but all it has done is f*** me up mentally ive seen things no one should ever see ive had to be the biggest dog on the yard befor and ive been beaten to the point i was hospitalized ive come to hate violance yet its all i know at times i dont wantto be angry yet thats the main emotion i feel ive tried taking classes ive tried to be a better person yet i worry if thats the case i came to prison because i was a heroin addict i robbed a gas station and broke my leg in the proccess ( i know worst crimminal ever) things gt worse and worse for me im blessed to say im sober today oct.5 2018 will mark 3 years sober for me and im blessed for that. im nto sure how to get reconeccted with the out side world i refuse to go back to the town i origanally did my crimes i want a fresh start yet there isntmuch help for people getting out of prison yes its easier to get a job now but theres just very limited recsources with houseing money clothes ect ect… i know i have a year to figure this out im just worried is all and not sure how to feel about all of it guess ill just take 1 day at a time and remind myself to breathe i hope you all have a wonderful day and got something out of this just remeber we are people too and even though we lose sight in that we do have feeling and hopeully your thier to remind your person behind bars just who they are this is a hard road to do alone i know i did 2.5 years completly alone and that was the hardest time i did worse than being at the violent prisons or anything well im about to run out of time yall have a great day be kind and courtious it doesnt cost a thing
sincerely

Stephen Coe
DOC #a677973