Though the sun shines bright and beautiful, from our prospective it always falls away. Then there’s darkness with this bright illuminated white light that seems to not reach us. Sometimes life seems like at any moment everything will come crashing down. Sometimes it feels like everything IS crashing down. Its hard picking up the pieces and trying to solve a puzzle you just can’t seem to figure out. Giving up is the best option some of us feel like we have at the moment. Feelings of desperation and vulnerability weigh in and irrational thinking leads to consequential actions. I’ve been through this sequence of events before and now I feel as though I’m going through them all over again. I know what’s going on around me and out in the free world. I know that what I’m going through is just a test that I’ve had the opportunity to take before but failed miserably. The love and support that I crave and want to give is being choked out and I refuse to tap out. The thought of being a better father and person overall inspires me to aspire to grow in all areas of my life. Just because I’m in prison doesn’t mean I’m a product of my past. Just because my past is filled with despicable acts doesn’t mean I still act or think the same way. I’m sorry for my past actions and unfortunately they are being held against me by those who are and should be close to me. These last few days has opened my eyes and mind to the fact that when my journey is finished here in a couple of years doing this prison time its not going to be what I expected it to be when I’m free. As selfish as it may sound I have to think about myself so that I can be a loving and supporting father for my kids first and foremost. I’m going to leave you all with my 3 P’s… stay progressive, stay positive, and stay persistent. The sun will always rise and shine again. Tonights question is how do you move forward from a past that just won’t go away?
Da’Von Joshua Motley Sr.
Categories: Da'Von Motley Sr.