There is a monster in Louisiana and the doom of men follow in her wake. Her insatiable lust to bind men with unending captivity carves away the hope and faith that define them. She is unemotional, without mercy and fierce in anger against those who violate state law.
Hello, I am Matthew and I too have fallen into the gaping maw of this leviathan we call the Louisiana Department of Safety and Corrections. In a few months I will be fifty-one years old having lost almost half my life to the corrections system. I came to prison in 1994 and will ultimately satisfy my thirty year obligation in 2024. I was fortunate, however, to have been released in 2009 for “good-time” during which time I enjoyed upward mobility in both my employment and social communities. I worked hard, saved a little money and established good credit. After buying my first new home I began to feel as if I had found my true identity as an honest citizen. By then, prison had become just a distant nightmare buried in the past.
But that nightmare was not finished with me and revisited me with brutal unforgiveness. In January of 2015 my supervisory release was revoked for non-criminal violations and I was returned to prison. My home was forclosed, both vehicles repossed, my personal property lost or stolen. I am broken and undone, my soul has no peace. I am crushed under the cruelty of the “corrections” juggernaut.
And yet te kernel of life remains; a spark of hope compels me on. I will again discharge on supervisory release, for good-time earned, in October of 2018 and be expected to abide by the rules; no bars, no partying, no drinking; work, pay fines, pay fees, bay bills; pay-pay-pay.
As you read this, my unorthodoxed introduction, you are most probably thinking I am bitter and full of hate. And you would be correct to think this way; at first. As I was reincarcerated in January of 2015, for three months I cried agonizing tears of consternation while praying, “how has this happened?” However, during the past three years I have learned something about myself and have chosen to write about it.
My purpose in writing is certainly not to impart some new enlightenment, profound wisdom or to complain about my misfortune. I write simply to offer the truth of my heart. Some of you may disregard my opinion as being only “malarky,” others may discover a genuine point of view. You may decide for yourselves.
I inend to write a short blog once per week for the next eight months. I would consider my efforts a great success should I continue to learn more of myself and maybe give something to you along the way.
Matthew Gilmore #330028
RLCC, Hope B2
1630 Prison Rd.
Cottonport, La 71327-4055
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